Tag: chihuahuas

Grief.

I can remember a relative passing away when I was 12. It was my first real glimpse with death. I can also recall our first pet’s passing. It was a cold and rainy day in January. She was too young. 😭

It’s normal. As you age, the people around you get older and pass on. I lost three grandparents in the 2010s. As a young adult, the loss was palpable. I was sad, angry, and in disbelief. I’ve come to terms with it a decade later, but the void never leaves me. The same can be said about family pets.

Losing Beari has suffocated me at times. I didn’t want to let go, but euthanasia was the best for her. I’m still so angry because cancer took her away from us. I just picked up her chew toys in my room. I miss her so much. Her scent lingers at home. The silence is deafening. I miss her barks. I miss her companionship. I miss everything! 🥺 This is an adjustment period. It’d be nice to take in another dog, but I’m not ready. We’re not ready.

Her birthday is almost here. We’d like to have a special meal for her and maybe some cupcakes to celebrate her life. Change comes with the territory. I’m doing my best to adapt. Owning a pet is one of the greatest feelings in the world! But saying goodbye is the hardest part.

I love you, Beari. ❤️🐻❤️

b

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😔

We have 1.5 days left with Beari. Her send off will be Saturday afternoon. I requested the day off from work to grieve with family and process.

Tried to make the most of Thanksgiving, but it was just so somber. She’s still alert and has an appetite, but she physically can’t keep up anymore. 2022 has been so hard! I really thought things would improve for her after her diagnosis. It was pretty much an uphill battle.

Thankful for the almost 6 years we had with her. It’s going to be tough. I can’t. 💔

I’ll distract myself later, but this chapter of our lives is almost over. I’m so sad. I’ve accepted it, but she’s leaving us too soon.

Good night.

b

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The final days.

I didn’t think we’d be saying goodbye so soon. Beari’s cancer has spread and we’re out of options. I wish we had more time, but we had five great years together.

We’re planning for her best week ever! The beach, her fave foods, and whatever else we can think of to send her off.

Losing a pet is never easy. But seeing her in pain is really tough. 😭

I wish her peace and comfort. We love you, Beari. ❤️🐻❤️

I am broken.

b

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⚾️🥵

Baseball is my escape. Bummed that the season is winding down, but it is what it is. Looking forward to football! 7 more days. Niners!!!

Went to the Giants game with my friends. We won!!! Couldn’t stay in our seats though. Too hot!

It was Alaska voucher day. I’m trying to figure out where to go and when. I’m leaning towards Hawaii. I miss the islands! Haven’t been since 2004. Would love to return. I’ll be very respectful to the land.

There’s a lot on my plate, but taking it day by day. We’re still fundraising for Beari’s chemo and it’s been really slow. I’m grateful for any amount people are able to donate. We gotta get creative, but I’m not sure how.

I’m super sleepy. I took a nap earlier, but it didn’t really help.

It’s warming up in the SF Bay Area. Thankfully SF will be decent compared to inland temps. I cannot! Please stay cool and hydrated. 🌊 We’re a few weeks away from the fall! I’ll miss the summer, but I’m ready for everything pumpkin. 😋🎃

Wishing you all a great week! Take care.

b

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Day 193.

Happy Monday! Today would’ve been Laki’s 20th Birthday. I miss him so much. He was one of the sweetest dogs ever. Happy Birthday! 💛🐶 We made mochi pancakes for him. So good!

I slept in. I was tired. I watched Before Sunrise before bed. I loved it! Planning to watch the 2nd film in the series later on this week. A young Ethan Hawke! Great casting.

So some good news. The sister and I were rocking out to One Direction! Then a text from him appears. I haven’t read it. Anxiety…lol. It’s almost been three days since I heard from him. We’re friends, but like I’m interested. And I don’t know where he stands. This pandemic makes everything more awkward and weird. So that’s where I’m at right now. Stay tuned. 🙃

We had Taco Bell in honor of Laki. Hurrah!

Niners injuries have been confirmed. Bosa and Thomas are out – torn ACLs. 😭 I’ll miss seeing them out there. Get well soon! ❤️💛

I still gotta exercise. I can’t nap since I have an important doctor’s appointment tomorrow. I’m looking forward to seeing my medical team and update them about my life. 💜

Giants are losing to the Rockies. Oh well. Let’s do better the rest of the home stand. Postseason or bust. Lol.

Hoping to be more productive this week. Animal Crossing has been okay. I sold a bunch of fish to C.J. today.

Time to work out. Listening to BLACKPINK to get me pumped.

Have a good night!

b

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Day 174.

How is it almost Thursday?! Happy Wednesday! I stayed up to watch Feel the Beat. It was pretty good. I love dance movies!

I’ve been pretty tired today, but I got my exercise in. 300 squats done. I’m halfway there! 💪🏼 I also had to nap. My sleep was interrupted by our dog. She’s such a rascal, but we love her.

The Giants only scored 6 runs today and that’s okay. The bullpen wasn’t very stable. They’ve played 38 games. The season is winding down. Whether we get to the postseason or not, I’m proud of the 🖤🧡. It’s been an interesting, but progressive season. #BlackLivesMatter

Animal Crossing update: I caught some new bugs. Redd didn’t stop by today. Maybe tomorrow or Friday? I’m always seeking out new art pieces to add to the museum. I want more statues. 😄

I’m still dealing with anxiety and overthinking, but I’m working through it. Sometimes I just sit with my emotions. So many new and exciting things happening – regardless of the outcome. I’m proud for putting myself out there and taking a chance. 💜

My Simpsons print arrived today. Must figure out where to put it.

Caught the last of Game 7 between the Thunder-Rockets. It was a nail biter until the end. Houston is moving on. I really miss the Warriors! 💙💛

My legs feel like Jell-o. 🙃 But I’m making progress each day. I even had two smoothies today! Yay for health and wellness. Everyone’s on their own journey. We’re all works in progress. I’m rooting for y’all! 🥰

Take care, everyone!!

Good night.

b

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Day 69.

Happy National Dog Rescue Day! ❤️ Rescue dogs are the best. Our dear Sal, we love you.

Animal Crossing has been consuming a lot of my time. I’m still figuring out what to do throughout my island. I don’t want to overthink it. Takes the fun away.

Happy Birthday, IZ! I was practicing Somewhere Over The Rainbow for a while today. I even recorded audio to listen to what I need to fix. Switching can be challenging, but it’s not impossible. 🌈 I also want to greet my uncle a Happy Birthday! 🙂🇨🇦

I washed dishes, did laundry, and tidied things up. Cleaning is fun. I didn’t even nap. I was a trouper today! 🙂

Lastly, our dog’s liver condition is progressing a bit. So she must take antibiotics on top of what she’s already taking. We’re thinking of including milk thistle with some of her meals. I hope it works. She’s only 3. We’re going to do as much as we can for her. I’m going to stay positive.

We’re going to watch Gordon Ramsey’s 24 Hours To Hell And Back to end the night. It’s a great show!

Hope you all had a good day.

Good night.

b

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