Tag: photography

Regrets of the dying.

My sister has mentioned this to me before. I’d like to read the book soon. Long story short, I don’t want to die with regrets.

I want to do it all. For me. I’ve been anxious about something the last few months and I’ve internalized it. Part of me doesn’t want to show up. But the other part wants me to bc I care with my entire chest. Sigh.

I know I’m not thee girl, but I care. I want to believe that this story isn’t over. I was vulnerable and shared a lot of myself. I don’t regret that.

I want to be fearless, but yes I’m still scared. Milestone year for me in 2027 and I don’t want to hold back anymore. This is for me! All of it. The next five months are mine. I want to finally get that first tattoo. 😎

Do it anyway!!! Life is short. I don’t want anything to stop me.

Do you, boo. Always. 💜

b

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Melancholy.

That’s been my current state. Also I’m very tired. I worked 6 days in a row. Day off wasn’t really a day off. Back to work later 😭

Keeping away from social media rn. It annoys me so badly. Like that’s how people stay connected?! It’s so fake and hella curated. Part of me wants to stay away for a while. People know how to reach me, but it’s quiet.

Just processing a lot of things. My health is taking a hit rn. Some of my labs are elevated and the other is lower than normal. So I’m taking my iron again. Hopefully that boosts my system come mid-August.

Still trying to figure something out. It’s been bothering me.

HKIA has been my lifesaver tbh.

Well, this is good night.

b

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Ariana Grande!!

My twin sister and I were in attendance for n1 in Oakland. Opening night!!! We were both so excited. It was her first Ari show. It was my third. 🩵 We took the ferry over. Hella scenic and peaceful.

It was an amazing day. Just didn’t like the rude merch lady. I said she skipped me and she was like no I didn’t. If you didn’t bother to acknowledge me, that’s totally skipping me and tending to the people behind me. But whatever. The cashier was way nicer. I don’t understand the rude tone from some people. Just own up to your mistake and carry on.

I ended up getting an additional shirt and a tote bag. I got everything else at the pop up! Really glad I went the first day bc they ran out of stuff in the city.

I’m hella grateful I got tix face value! Resellers suck.

Ari’s back!!! ❤️ Hope the rest of tour goes well. Pop up madness in LA. I feel bad for the people who lined up today and still didn’t get in. They need to be better about restocking!!! And start putting a limit on stuff. They didn’t do that for SF.

Early day for me! I’m excited. Hope I get the blind box I want. Haha.

Good night.

b

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Reset.

Things are getting calmer on my end. Final project and final exam have concluded. Work is slowing down and I’ve only got a few more weeks of teaching. I need a vacay, but I’ll take going to concerts as my getaway!!! Ari in 13 days ahh 🩵

Missing someone and not being able to talk to them because I might be bothering them or they don’t want to hear from me is a bit discouraging so I’m just doing my own thing atm. 😭 I’m such a Pisces, lol

Yesterday was a rare Saturday off for me so I had brunch with my sister and we played tourist for the day. Wore the wrong shoes. 😂 Now my feet are paying for it. Oh well

Ate a lot of delicious food and snacks! I love you, San Francisco.

I don’t want anyone trying to piss me off later. I know how I can get. 😒

So many changes and moving pieces right now. I’m feeling a lot. It’s truly bittersweet, but maybe I just need a new chapter. Tapping into my hobbies and itching to be creative again.

Got my hair done almost a week ago. I’m summer ready!!! It’s so pretty. Here’s to the long weekend.

Good night!

b

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Life lately.

Been taking a mini break from social media. It’s been nice not looking at stories, lolll.

First drone flight yesterday! I was nervous, anxious, and excited. Classmates were way too close to each other. I was the second person there and everyone started crowding.

Learning a lot! It’s fun. Just need to read more. Did well on my midterm too. 😎 Spring break next week, but I work. Ahh!

Doing my best to show up for myself. My Lyft driver rephrased “I’m tired” to “I’m active”. He also gave me a confidence boost. Something I’ve been lacking these last few weeks.

I still miss him. 🥲

Sutro Tower! 🧡 Looking forward to flying more. The more practice, the better.

Still awake. Should probably ko soon.

Later!

b

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♓️✨

I’ve been a year older for a week already. I guess I’m wiser. 😂

I’m coming down with a cold and it’s awful. I was sick back in January. Ahh!

Hoping I can stop it. Emergen-C to the rescue.

Life’s been okay. I’m looking forward to the next two weeks. We shall see! ☺️

Time to sleep. Good night.

b

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I already miss Japan.

I got home on December 2nd. Still dealing with jet lag. Been sleeping on and off. I’m awake now so I’ve decided to type out some thoughts.

I had a beautiful time out there! I didn’t get to do everything so I’m already planning my second visit. ☺️ The last few months were challenging for me, so I was happy to reward myself with a trip.

Long plane rides are torturous for me. I couldn’t stay in my seat either. I had to get up and walk + use the bathroom. Had to keep the blood flowing. Decent seat neighbors. Plane food was pretty good too.

The goal right now is to save and pay off bills! I spent a lot out there, but I have no regrets. Missing all of the food! 😭

The highlight of my trip was seeing Mt. Fuji! Going to Puroland too. I was also able to navigate transit. I’m so proud of myself!!!

Now I’m back home trying to get back to normal life. Missing some people that I hope to see very soon. Life is already changing. Please slow down just for a bit.

Good night. 💜

b

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Coach Beam.

It’s tragic and heartbreaking what happened to him on Thursday. I was stunned when I saw the headline.

I didn’t know about him until Last Chance U. I watched a bit of that season, but now I’ll have to finish it.

I never formally met him, but we were on the same flight home from JFK to SFO back in 2024. I had to do a double take. He was rocking his green, so I knew it was him!! He was on the phone. I wish I would’ve said hello and shook his hand, but that’s okay.

JUCO football is still fairly new to me because I didn’t pay much attention to it before I transferred to UC Davis. But now, I fully support it!!! I’ve got a friend on the Laney football team who is about to transfer to a D1 school. We’re bay rivals, but I still support him. 😂

It’s hard to wrap my head around everything at the moment. Coach Beam gave so much to Oakland. He was a pillar for the East Bay, the Bay Area, and beyond. Football lost a great one.

His final year of coaching was the 2024 season. I was fortunate enough to see a game at Laney last October. I saw him on the sidelines.

RIP Coach Beam. You’ve touched so many lives!

Photo credit: John Beam

2 claps, ready ready. 🦅💚

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