Friendships.

I couldn’t sleep right away so I was just sitting and reflecting on my friendships – past, current, and future.

I bring those to life tbh. Sometimes it’s reciprocated and sometimes it’s not. I thought about the friendships that are no longer active in my life. The ongoing theme is me reaching out. Once I stop reaching out, it’s quiet af.

It makes me feel small sometimes, but I’ve learned to reframe it. But it makes me question myself. Am I too much? 😭 I think I do my best with friendships, even when I don’t have the capacity. I listen, I offer advice when I’m able to, and I love gifting things to others. I’m always so thoughtful.

Consideration. Sighhh. Sometimes I feel like I’m just an afterthought. A painful realization. But I also have a lot of good people in my corner.

I know connections don’t last forever and some people come into your life for a season and maybe even as a lesson. But I truly do care about every encounter and every conversation I’ve had with others. I just wish people treated me as such.

I won’t stop being a good person, but sometimes I just want someone else to handle things for me. I’m tired. 💜

Good day!

b

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Melancholy.

That’s been my current state. Also I’m very tired. I worked 6 days in a row. Day off wasn’t really a day off. Back to work later 😭

Keeping away from social media rn. It annoys me so badly. Like that’s how people stay connected?! It’s so fake and hella curated. Part of me wants to stay away for a while. People know how to reach me, but it’s quiet.

Just processing a lot of things. My health is taking a hit rn. Some of my labs are elevated and the other is lower than normal. So I’m taking my iron again. Hopefully that boosts my system come mid-August.

Still trying to figure something out. It’s been bothering me.

HKIA has been my lifesaver tbh.

Well, this is good night.

b

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Brooo.

Juggling a lot of questions, but I feel like I already know the answers.

But sometimes, you just gotta live and do the damn thing. Sighhh. Let me sit with all of this. If there’s supposed to be some sort of sign or direction in the next few days, that would be helpful. 😂

I’m tired. Physically and mentally. I need a mini summer break, but I don’t know if that’ll happen.🤞

HKIA is keeping me busy. I’ve slept late the last two days. I need to chill, but it’s such a fun game.

Anyway, I should get ready for bed and then play again. Hahaha.

Good night.

b

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Ariana Grande!!

My twin sister and I were in attendance for n1 in Oakland. Opening night!!! We were both so excited. It was her first Ari show. It was my third. 🩵 We took the ferry over. Hella scenic and peaceful.

It was an amazing day. Just didn’t like the rude merch lady. I said she skipped me and she was like no I didn’t. If you didn’t bother to acknowledge me, that’s totally skipping me and tending to the people behind me. But whatever. The cashier was way nicer. I don’t understand the rude tone from some people. Just own up to your mistake and carry on.

I ended up getting an additional shirt and a tote bag. I got everything else at the pop up! Really glad I went the first day bc they ran out of stuff in the city.

I’m hella grateful I got tix face value! Resellers suck.

Ari’s back!!! ❤️ Hope the rest of tour goes well. Pop up madness in LA. I feel bad for the people who lined up today and still didn’t get in. They need to be better about restocking!!! And start putting a limit on stuff. They didn’t do that for SF.

Early day for me! I’m excited. Hope I get the blind box I want. Haha.

Good night.

b

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Reset.

Things are getting calmer on my end. Final project and final exam have concluded. Work is slowing down and I’ve only got a few more weeks of teaching. I need a vacay, but I’ll take going to concerts as my getaway!!! Ari in 13 days ahh 🩵

Missing someone and not being able to talk to them because I might be bothering them or they don’t want to hear from me is a bit discouraging so I’m just doing my own thing atm. 😭 I’m such a Pisces, lol

Yesterday was a rare Saturday off for me so I had brunch with my sister and we played tourist for the day. Wore the wrong shoes. 😂 Now my feet are paying for it. Oh well

Ate a lot of delicious food and snacks! I love you, San Francisco.

I don’t want anyone trying to piss me off later. I know how I can get. 😒

So many changes and moving pieces right now. I’m feeling a lot. It’s truly bittersweet, but maybe I just need a new chapter. Tapping into my hobbies and itching to be creative again.

Got my hair done almost a week ago. I’m summer ready!!! It’s so pretty. Here’s to the long weekend.

Good night!

b

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I can’t again.

Sally was diagnosed with mammary cancer yesterday. Brings me back to 2022! I can’t. 😭 I’ve been processing it. I cried before I tackled the day. I was on the verge of tears at work.

She’s such a sweet dog. I’m hoping we get more time with her.

Day by day. That’s the motto.

Then other stuff is bothering me too. I don’t like it when people get in my business and I didn’t ask them for their opinion. 😒😤

I know I’m stubborn. Let me be. Mistakes, lessons, etc.

I’m just sad. Feeling quite anxious and lonely.

Sighhh. I’ll figure it out.

Time to sleep. Good night!

b

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Life lately.

Been taking a mini break from social media. It’s been nice not looking at stories, lolll.

First drone flight yesterday! I was nervous, anxious, and excited. Classmates were way too close to each other. I was the second person there and everyone started crowding.

Learning a lot! It’s fun. Just need to read more. Did well on my midterm too. 😎 Spring break next week, but I work. Ahh!

Doing my best to show up for myself. My Lyft driver rephrased “I’m tired” to “I’m active”. He also gave me a confidence boost. Something I’ve been lacking these last few weeks.

I still miss him. 🥲

Sutro Tower! 🧡 Looking forward to flying more. The more practice, the better.

Still awake. Should probably ko soon.

Later!

b

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♓️✨

I’ve been a year older for a week already. I guess I’m wiser. 😂

I’m coming down with a cold and it’s awful. I was sick back in January. Ahh!

Hoping I can stop it. Emergen-C to the rescue.

Life’s been okay. I’m looking forward to the next two weeks. We shall see! ☺️

Time to sleep. Good night.

b

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