LET ME THINK 20.

There’s a lot going on, but it’s all good! One day at a time. πŸ™‚

I’m doing my best to enjoy my time off! I love being busy, but we all need a break now and then.

I’m prepping for my medical procedure. Looking at the positives. I should be okay. But man, do I miss regular food. And wine πŸ˜›

Always a great time catching up with friends! So much positivity all around ❀️ I’m so grateful.

Well, this is good night. Happy weekend to all!!

b

Resting up.

Hi!

I just returned from Orlando. I’m catching up on other life things. I’d like to update the blog soon. I’m hoping to work on an entry tonight.

I’m still recovering from the car accident. Bruises are fading, but I’m still unable to put too much pressure on my knees. It hurts. 😦 Being in a vehicle has stressed me out. I’m reminded of what happened. It’s scary!!

Sally is still adjusting too. I hope she warms up to us soon.

Happy Friday!

b

Bruised and sore.

Here’s my update. I went through a lot this past weekend. It was actually terrifying.

We adopted a dog to add to the family on Saturday, 6/23. Her name is Sally. She’s a chihuahua, five years old, and was born with one eye. The other eye didn’t develop. 😦 She’s originally from the Central Valley. She’s very sweet, but still adjusting to her new environment. Anyway, after adopting her, we decided to go to Petco to buy a few things for her – a kennel, food dish & water bowl, a bed, and a toy. We were looking forward to getting home, but we never got there.

On our way home, my brother and I were involved in a car accident. We were 10 minutes away from home. We were at 23rd Street and South Van Ness. It was our light to go. As my brother attempted to make a left, this car is speeding from the left side and hits us. He pressed on the brakes as much as he could have. Our car is a tank, but a lot of the damage was in the front. I saw the bumper fly off. It was the first automobile accident that I’ve been involved in ever. It was really scary! And having the dogs there was even scarier, but they’re safe. I on the other hand had to be transported to the ER due to my underlying health conditions and I was bruised up pretty badly. I’ve got bruises on my knees, my chest, and overall soreness everywhere. I’m still dealing with it. It sucks! :/

X-Rays were ordered for my knee. Thankfully there was no fracture. I was able to go home after a few hours.

Our Subaru saved us just like in their commercials and I am eternally grateful. I can’t emphasize enough how important it is to be attentive behind the wheel. Please stay away from all distractions, especially your phones. It can wait!!! I don’t drive enough in the city, but it’s always the other drivers. You can be the safest driver, but someone else can mess that up for you.

I’m recovering now and should be healed up for Orlando. I’m very excited! πŸ™‚

Thank you so much to my cousin, Adrian for getting to the scene, the witnesses, and first responders.

Hope you all had a great weekend. Here’s to an awesome week!!

b

LET ME THINK 19.

I’m sleepless sometimes and then I crash. These last few weeks have been something. I must confront everything at this point. Avoidance doesn’t work. 😦 Staying positive is difficult. I must block out the noise and negativity. I tell myself to keep going and I will.

Prayer has helped me. Reading is also comforting.

Please send good vibes.Β 

Thank you.

b

LET ME THINK 18.

It was a long week. The weekend was restless for me.

The next couple of weeks are going to test my patience, mentality, and focus. I just have to keep going! #resilience Family is keeping me afloat. There will be better days. I know it!!!

On another note, I’ve been thinking about love. All my past crushes and unrequited love. I wish them all well! But wouldn’t it be crazy if I randomly bumped into one of them and suddenly we reconnected?! Yeah, right. Haha. Stranger things have happened.

This is also a reminder that I can do anything! Reach for the stars.

I’m tired. Good night and have a great week!

b

LET ME THINK 17.

I’m gonna switch this one up a bit. Anyway, I’m sleepy, but I can’t sleep. Not until I get this off of my chest.

Am I hard to love? Am I looking for love in all of the wrong places? Am I being proactive about love? Some of the many questions that go on in my anxiety filled mind.

I think I do my best to be my most genuine self and sometimes it still doesn’t feel enough. I feel like putting myself out there will just be disappointing every time. Am I not opening myself up enough? I have my reservations. I’ve been hurt in the past, so my walls are very high. I might’ve mentioned this in a previous entry. I easily am hurt when people disrespect me. At times, I feel like I’m not being taken seriously. On top of that, I’ve encountered people who pose as your wing person only to have them betray you. I understand that everyone isn’t the same, but that one incident stung. I really thought I could trust her. I revisit it a lot and I wish I could’ve done it differently. Instead of telling her that it was okay. Because it wasn’t.

In the words of Kylo Ren, “Let the past die.” Oh believe me, I’m trying.

Now I’m ready to sleep.

Good night.

b

LET ME THINK 16.

  1. This day has come. I’m so sad. Today is our cousin’s funeral. I don’t want to say goodbye. 😦
  2. I’ve been processing the last few days. Family is everything.
  3. Relatives still can’t tell Bianca and I apart. Lol. #twinlife #twins
  4. It’s been great catching up with everyone.
  5. Maria(n) was strong and I will continue to be.

Good night. I have to be up in a few hours.

b

LET ME THINK 15.

  1. It’s been a while since I’ve done this.
  2. Heavy week for me. I’m filled with sadness, but comforted with peace.
  3. I’ll be seeing family this weekend. Three days of togetherness. Much needed.
  4. I’m learning to let the little things go. After Marian’s passing, life isn’t the same.
  5. We miss her so much. I wish we had more time. Where did the years go?

Good night!

b

RIP Marian.

I found out yesterday morning that our cousin had passed peacefully. I’m thankful that I was able to visit her. I held her hand, we prayed, and I kept telling her to be strong.

Life isn’t the same without her. My only regret is not having enough time and just reaching out. These last few years have been difficult and it’s unfortunate that we had to see family under these circumstances.

I want to be a better person. I want to keep my family ties strong. And I just want to be a positive person! Marian was all of that and more.

I think back on so many memories, especially when we were all growing up. I’ll always remember the family trips and the parties. I hope we can continue the tradition of making memories and taking photographs together again.

Don’t take life for granted. As Marian had posted: “Die with memories, not dreams.”

Rest in love and in peace, Marian. We love you and we miss you so much already.

b